Mutterings of a Fool

Man, Dad, Runner, Chief dog walker

How long can it take to learn how to breathe properly?

The first NCT class was everything I expected it to be; slightly eccentric teacher, dads looking like a rabbit in headlights, mums clearly worried about the whole labour thing and a a nice dollop of awkward silences peppered with nervous tension. In case you’ve been following the news in the past week or so the ‘C’ word was mentioned by the teach in the first 30 seconds. That is C for Caesarean not C for crying or child or even cut down on the chocolate fatty. So good to know we have an open minded teacher who is trying to give us as much information as possible.

However there was one issue, the teacher reminded me of Alice from the Vicar of Dibley. Starting in the first 5 minutes with the repeated use of Okee Kokee and continuing throughout the evening. Quite honestly I couldn’t take her seriously, it felt like I was being taught by a pre-school teacher. This of course greatly annoyed the lady of the manor, who tried to rise above my childish giggles.

Interestingly when asked the top question from the group was ‘what the hell are we going to do for 6 hours on Saturday’! Seriously how long does it take to learn how to breathe correctly! Plus the men were somewhat intrigued by the very secretive ‘ladies only’ session next week. Intrigued, but actually not really wanting to even imagine what may be discussed.

But actually a worthwhile evening in the end, met a few people in the same boat as us as it were. Plus discovered one of the couples live about 100m away from us. We only moved to the town a year ago and have struggled so far to really build any friendships given that neither of us actually works there. So the next few sessions will be spent figuring out if they are ‘our kind of people’.


  1. I’d feel the saame way about your Okee-Kokee teacher. have you tried any jokes on her yet? I think you should…

    We missed out on all this; in fact I’m still not entirely sure what NCT is!

  2. I bet the ladies only session is the bit where they discuss all the things you don’t talk about in front of your husband if you ever want him to think of you as his wife again and not just the mother of his child LOL!

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