Mutterings of a Fool

Man, Dad, Runner, Chief dog walker

Tag: Home birth

Entering the red zone – round 3

Alex 33 weeksThis is it, we’re entering the red zone, 4 weeks and counting until due date which means it’s entirely feasible baby boy could arrive at any time. Scary. We’ve done this twice already so there isn’t that fear of the unknown, of what birth will be like and how it will feel to hold him for the first time. But I’m still nervous. Nervous I think about the reality of having a newborn again and of having 3 children. The latter is perhaps the most scary, the first few days with a new baby are always chaotic but with 2 other children to think about also it’s likely to be even worse. I’m sure we’ll settle into a routine soon enough but I can imagine our patience will be tested, little steps each day though right?

I really hope Matilda and Henry get on with their new brother, I think they will, they talk about helping him do things. Matilda tells us that she’s going to hold his hand when we cross the road, which is far too cute. But you never know do you? You never know exactly how they’re going to react to a baby having our attention a lot of the time rather than them. When Henry was born we made sure to give Matilda attention and also not just ignore her whenever he cried, we had a plan for integrating but this time we’re going more on feel. Perhaps that’s what happens when you’ve been parents for a while? You sweat the small stuff less and learn to adapt as you go along rather than assuring yourself that your grand plan will work.

However I did come across this photo while writing this post, even at 14 months old Matilda loved having a brother, let’s hope it’s the same 2nd time around.

Matilda with a new born Henry

We’ve decided to have a home birth this time, in fact we decided that with Henry too but there was no midwife available in the end on the day he was born, so this time we’re hoping to have more luck. What I love is that the midwives we’ve had this time and with Henry have always been so positive and excited about a home birth, they’re all 40+ so maybe they like someone who doesn’t want a birth surrounded by hospital machines? I’ll be honest, a home birth does make me a little uneasy, I like the vision of a baby born at night and having Matilda and Henry come down in the morning to meet him. But I worry about the what if; our first 2 births have been pretty straightforward but you who knows what will happen this time. Plus of course there is the ‘stuff’, the bodily fluids and all that *shudders*, the lady of the manor is a nurse so has seen far worse, I on the other hand am a little squeamish. I also have visions of turning around and finding Bracken trying to eat it and running off with a piece of placenta in his mouth when we try to stop him.

Planning for the birth has so far involved working out the many permutations of what the children could be doing and who will help look after them if we need it. We’ve also packed an overnight bag for them and the lady of the manor. Finally I’ve bought enough plastic sheeting to cover the whole of the downstairs in preparation for all the ‘stuff’, the only thing left to order is the birthing pool. We did have some debate over the pool when I discovered it takes 3 whole tanks of water to fill, but apparently the fact we’re on a water meter shouldn’t dictate the birth plan.

Now we wait……..

Labour, a man’s perspective – part 2

This is the second post about the birth of Henry, the first can be found here.

So here I sit, a moment of calm after a night of adrenaline fueled activity. My little purple dude in the cot next to me, I’m watching him closely just to make sure he’s still breathing. Doesn’t matter that it’s the second time it still as scary as shit isn’t it? I mean it’s magical and all that how humans are made and born but you still take some convincing that it’s an actual real life human that has popped out and is now lying in front of you. (and yes I know they don’t just pop out but hey this is a man’s view don’t forget).

This birth involved nothing that we planned, no home birth for us as there weren’t midwives available to send. We had no bag packed, no plan of what to take or where it was. No decisions made about what we wanted to happen at the hospital etc. Somehow I seemed to have managed to get pretty much everything we needed into a bag in 5 minutes and off we went. But it worked out, it went well, it went quickly.

We lucked out and there was no one else in the delivery ward so we could use the pool. Which although we’d never discussed actually suited us pretty well and in hindsight made for a really ‘nice’ labour. Certainly the lady of the manor seems to have recovered much quicker than with Matilda.

There was a real heart stopping moment right at the end of the labour when the cord got stuck around his neck and the midwife wanted the lady of the manor out of the water NOW. But she stood up and his shoulders popped out and we were home dry. But then we looked at him and he was blue, I mean really blue. And not breathing. SHIT. My heart  was beating at a hundred miles and hour as they put him on the resuscitator. Then we heard that all important cry and touch wood everything looks to be ok.

Now we have a few hours of chill out in our own little cocoon in the delivery suite while the little purple dude warms up. A precious few hours before we face the reality of 2 children under 2 and the chaos of the many visitors to come.

I’m pretty tired, but no man is brave enough or stupid enough to actually say those words out loud in a delivery suite are they? I mean it was tough doing all that on 2 hours sleep but ‘all that’ isn’t much contained to the woman’s job is it? The lady of the manor was of course a legend, honestly never ceases to amaze me how she deals with the whole thing with just a bit of gas and air for assistance.