I am a man.

I like boobs.

Revelations worthy of Newsnight right?

But there is a serious point here, I promise, so hold on while I try to get there and not get distracted by the thought of boobs. The lady of the manor most definitely does not disappoint in the boob department, I would say that they are awesome but both my mum and my MIL read this so best not.

So to recap, I like boobs, the lady of the manor has great boobs. All looking good right? That is until one teeny tiny event happened that changed everything. Can you guess what it is?

A little boy was born and promptly set up camp in MY spot. With his feeding issues he was almost permanently there, guzzling away and turning into the not so little boy he is now. King of his domain and defender of his territory.

So what is a man to do? Where once I saw fun and excitement I now see Henry’s pit stop, his happy place. It’s changed and I think it’ll be a while before it feels the same again. That’s ok, I’m not bitter it’s just another part of being a dad, part of the adventure.

But I can’t just push him out can I? He does love it there and the lady of the manor definitely enjoys the cuddles with her little boy. Plus have you seen his face? Could he be any cuter with that big fat cheesy grin and naughty chuckle.

I guess I’ll just have to become a legs or arse man.

Henry screwing up face