Matilda was 10 months old this week, in those 10 months I have been 100% completely on my own with her for probably less than 10 days. But the lady of the manor is now back at work which means that every other weekend I am on my own from 6am to 9pm both days.
That is a long bloody time.
And to be perfectly honest it freaks me out a little. Don’t get me wrong I’m not like one of those dads on Daddy Daycare this week (or at least the ones the producers made them look like). I have always got my hands dirty so to speak, but its different when there is someone in the background for support.
But this is like going cold turkey, it’s just me, Matilda and Bracken. The lady of the manor at least has her NCT girls to bounce ideas off or see how they have dealt with things. I essentially have no one, family are all a long way away and the NCT blokes aren’t really interested, particularly at the weekends when they’re catching up with their own families.
The lady of the manor has had months to get to know what her cries mean, what kind of routine works, what to do when she’s grouchy/sick/tired and there is just no way she can tell me all these things.
But trial and error is a lot tougher when you have to do it in 2 days and the only 2 days a week when you get more than 30 mins together.
I think that’s the toughest part, given that I don’t see her much during the week I want the weekends to be full of fun and laughter, taking her out on trips, watching her learn to do new things. If I get it wrong with her naps or meal times it can instead be a weekend of tantrums and crying.
Like this weekend. A teething wee girl, 3 changes of clothes due to dirty nappies, a dog walk in the rain, yoghurt the only food eaten at meal times and tantrums at regular intervals during the day. Not quite what I had in mind.
But thank god for twitter, quick, useful, honest advice and re-assurance. You know who you are, you don’t know how much I appreciated it. It’s also the closest I get to some adult conversation all day, Bracken is a clever dog but hasn’t quite mastered polite conversation.